


jar of hearts

by Dark_Angel1976, orphan_account



Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: Anal Sex, Asshole Gerard Way, Car Accidents, Cheating, Drinking, Emotional Hurt, Gay, Gay Sex, M/M, Sex, Sleeping around
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-08
Updated: 2015-10-14
Packaged: 2018-04-25 10:45:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,581
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4957318
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dark_Angel1976/pseuds/Dark_Angel1976, https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Gerard is an asshole who Frank fell in love with</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> We do not own Gerard Way or Frank Iero or any one else mentioned in this fic. They don't condone any thing in this fic and it is fake, it is made up.

**Frank's POV**  
I have watched him over the years... His lovers always come and go. He collects and plays with them, keeping their hearts and moving on. It's his game. I've watched him do so since the moment I met him, and then he moved on to me. Frank Iero finally got what he wanted. At least I thought so.  
Gerard was...I thought perfect. I fell hard for him, even though I knew better, but I had hoped that I was different. In a way I was.... I know he loved me in his own way, but he just couldn't give himself completely to me or to anyone. I think now I realize it was something instilled in him by his upbringing.  
I watched him go through a few girls who were really irrelevant, and then he got involved with Bert, who was just as fucked up as he was. Maybe it was the drinking and drugs that drove him to sleep around with and destroy people, but I can't even be sure. He and Bert had an argument over something small, and Gerard moved on to Adam.  
There were a few more here and there that I can't really recall, those men were irrelevant, really, but he hurt them all. I was attracted to him from the moment we met, but I ended up living with Mikey. Me and the younger Way had a small fling, and my thing for the older Way should have ended there, but it didn't. He was always touching me, but it really started during Revenge era. He never kept his hands off me, and that was when I started to fall.  
Then came the Black Parade, that was when we first got together, other than quick hand jobs or blow jobs on the bus or some corner of a venue. The first time he fucked me was on the Black Parade tour, and I had begged him for it by the time he'd entered me.  
"Gee, god, please..." He smirked at me. He was being an asshole about it, and he knew it. "God damn it, Gee, fuck me, already!" I was a virgin in the sense I had never had anal sex before. Gerard finally gave in and slammed into me, balls deep in one hard thrust. It was painful at first, but he was every thing I could have wanted or asked for.  
"You like that, Frankie?" I nodded, panting as he started pumping into me, hitting my prostate expertly. I cried out his name as he made me cum, shivering and moaning as he came deep in my ass.  
After that, it was constant need, wanting his touch all the time. It became a regular thing, him touching me on stage, me kissing him... the fans loved it. Most just assumed it was a part of the show. Few realized that it really was our form of foreplay.  
Soon, the end of the tour came, and we moved on to project revolution and when he kissed me in front of the world I could have died happy.Then it became obvious that the end of our relationship was coming.  
"Gee, I... I thought you loved me."  
"I do, Frankie, but I can't be tied down while trying to write new stuff. You know they want a new album."  
It went like that until I saw him hanging out with a dark haired woman. I saw him kiss her, touch her like he used to with me. We recorded the Danger Days cd, touring and everything, but it wasn't the same. My heart and head weren't in it anymore. He had moved on to sleep with Grant from there, even after having married and leaving me alone.  
Gerard still had my heart, but he crushed it to pieces, first when he married her, the crazy dark haired bass playing woman. He killed what was left when he broke up the band.  
"Gerard, what about Ray and Mikey? What about me? Us? Don't you even give a damn about the fans?"  
"I don't really care, to be honest. I'm with Lindsey. Ray and Mikey will be fine. Put on your big boy pants and get it through your head that it's over. We're over."  
It made me angry, because I knew he even cheated on her with other men. It hurt even more that he'd moved on, and that it wasn't with me.  
My heart dropped, shattering on the floor. He didn't care. He really didn't. He didn't want me. I nodded once, refusing to let him see me cry as my eyes stung with unshed tears. I turned, walking out the door without a word, never looking back. That was two and a half years ago...  
Last week I ran into him. We hadn't spoken in all that time.He was as beautiful as he had been the day we met not much had changed.  
"Oh... Hello, Gerard." I spoke with a rather flat tone to my voice and dead look in my dull eyes  
"Hi, Frankie. I... I missed you." I smiled bitterly at him.  
"Yeah, right. What's to miss? The guy who loved you is long dead, Gerard. You killed him."  
"Frankie... please, hear me out. I am truly sorry for hurting you. I... I still love you."  
"Gerard, go home to your wife and kid. For some reason, they care. I don't. Not anymore."  
"But, but Frank... please..." I shook my head and held up a hand to stop the words before he could even snag me in his web again.  
"I'm sorry, but, no, my dear, that chapter is done... Goodbye, Gerard." I turned and walked away, finally closing the book on my relationship with him...  
  
**Gerard's pov**  
I tried. I still wanted my Frankie. I might have married Lindsey, but Frankie still held my heart. I'd waited until I knew he was in town, but the conversation didn't go as planned. He said goodbye, and never looked back. What the hell did I think would happen? That he'd be happy to fall back into my arms and back into my bed? One could only hope, but I'd fucked it up. Again.  
I hung my head, my heart falling to the floor and shattering as he said he didn't care. I suddenly understood how he'd felt that day. As he left, I sat on the nearest bench and cried.  
But he never looked back.  
He never saw me cry. Tears rolling down my cheeks as I watched my Frankie leave me. I knew I kept sleeping around. It wasn't to hurt Lynz, it was to fill the hole that Frank had ripped into my heart, the hole that I would never be able to fill. He was my world, my everything. Nothing would ever change that. Slowly, I turned, wiping my eyes and started walking back toward my car, a broken shell of the man that once was. I drove straight to the liquor store, buying a bottle to wash away my pain.


	2. Chapter 2

**Gerard's POV**  
I knew Frank was going to be in LA, and I really missed him, much more than I cared to admit. I had chosen to marry Lynz, and, not to say that I didn't love her in my own way, but she's not Frank...  
I had to see him. I had waited five long years. I called myself an idiot several times as I drove to the venue where Frank was playing. He was like a drug, and I was a junkie that'd gone too long without a fix. When I got there, the parking lot was almost full, but I managed to snag one of the last few spots.  
I hoped he wouldn't notice me there. I slipped in the door and hung back, far away from the stage, near the bar. I ordered and nursed a screwdriver, not really wanting to get drunk.  
I watched him come on the stage. He hadn't really changed at all, save for a few more tattoos I'd not seen before. He was as perfect as the moment I'd laid eyes on him. There he was on stage, belting out a song and he was pouring his heart into it. His long hair was sweaty and hanging in his eyes, sticking to his face. The crowd ate it up, the atmosphere almost as electric as at one of our old band's shows.  
Afterward, I watched him walk off stage, and I stood on the far side of the room, watching him as he greeted the fans waiting to meet him. Originally, I had planned on quickly slipping out before he had any chance of seeing me. I set down the cup I'd been sipping from and headed toward the door, when a kid shrieked out, "Is that Gerard?" I cringed, stopping mid-stride. Frank's head snapped up and his eyes met mine. I mostly wanted the floor to open and swallow me up. Instead, I stood there, frozen to the spot as he looked me in the eye.  
I knew now that I couldn't escape, and he sent over someone from the table where he was standing to speak with me. I stood there, staring, horrifed as his eyes broke away from mine. He whispered something to the person, and they the strode across the room to me.  
"Frank wants you to wait, stay here till he's done," the girl said. I didnt speak, only nodded and made my way out of the venue to wait for him. When he finished signing for the kids, he came to find me, leaning against his tour RV outside. My arms were folded nervously over my chest, shifting my feet awkwardly as he approached.  
"Hello, Gee" he said quietly.  
"I...I am sorry, Frank. I hadn't meant to disturb you, I just needed...needed to see you," I said softly, my voice sounding nervous.  
He waved it off and said, "Its not a big deal. Come on, lets step inside. It's cool out here in the night air." I followed him into the RV, and he looked around before closing and locking the door behind us, leaving us all alone.  
"Hey, is that the same Plymouth Fury you bought when we were touring?" He looked at me, almost nervously.  
"Yeah. Turned out pretty rad, just like the Christine car."  
"I wasn't sure... I figured you'd be driving the Trans Am, honestly, but I heard rumors that you donated it to a museum."  
"Yeah...too many memories that I couldn't deal with at the time. Frank, I..." he cut me off.  
"I missed you, Gerard," he said, moving closer and kissing me. At first, I was so shocked my lips didn't move, but I recovered quickly, moving my lips against his. Frank slipped out his tongue, letting his tangle together with mine in a long forgotten dance.  
"F-frank..." He backed us toward his bed, carefully maneuvering around the things he had on the floor. When his legs hit the edge of the bed he fell back on his ass to sit down, taking me down with him.  
I followed him down, dropping to my knees touching him every where my hands could reach. He broke the kiss, both of us panting. "Gee... my God, I want you..." He moved his hands to my waist, hauling me against his body roughly, kissing along my jaw line and down my neck.  
"Frankie... please..." I start panting, wanting him more than I thought possible.  
"Bed. Now." He snaps at me in a voice that's nothing less than an order. Frank didn't have to ask me twice. I scrambled onto the bed, laying on my back. He moved to kneel between my my feet. He reached out to unzip my pants, tugging the zipper quickly down. He pulled my jeans down to mid thigh, taking my cock in his hand. He began stroking me, slowly and teasingly, until I had reached full hardness, and then took me into his mouth. I'd missed the feel of his warm, wet mouth. I had been with other men while with Lynz, but none of them could make me feel the way that Frank did.  
Suddenly, he pulled away, leaving me feeling needy. He gripped my jeans, pulling them down my hips and off my feet. "Not wearing underwear as usual, I see," Frank said. He quickly moved to grab some hand lotion from his bag, squirting some into his hand. He slowly and teasingly stroked it all over my cock. I reached for the lotion to open him up, but he slapped my hands away.  
"I want you hard and fast, Gee, just like our first time." He didn't even bother to stretch himself, but he moved quickly to straddle my hips and my hands go his to hold him, my thumbs tracing the tattoo on his belly. He gripped my cock, rubbing the tip against his opening.  
"Frank, baby, you should let me stretch you. I don't want to hurt you." I tell him.  
"No," he said, pressing the head of my cock inside him. "Hard and rough." Suddenly, he slammed his hips down on me, stilling himself until he adjusted. Soon he started moving up and down on me. He rode me harder then he ever had before. I reached down to stroke his cock, but again he slapped my hands away. He took his own cock in his hand, moving his hand up and down the shaft, picking up speed until he pushed himself over the edge and started to tighten around me. I clawed at his hips as I entered his body over and over until I couldn't take any more. My stomach coiling and my balls were drawn up tight. Suddenly, I threw my head back, arching my back, cumming deep inside him. He slipped off me and moved to clean himself up as I lay on his bed, trying to catch my breath.  
"Damn, Frankie... you're fucking amazing." He turned to look at me.  
"Get out," he said quietly, and at first I thought he was joking.  
"Oh, come on, I wasn't that bad, was I?" I asked with a chuckle.  
"Get. The. Fuck. Out. Now, Gerard." I stared at him, my mouth hanging open.  
"But... Frank, please..." I tried to plead. He picked up my clothing, throwing it at me.  
"Get out, Gee" I dressed quickly, and, taking him by the shoulders, pulled him against me. I gave him a brutally punishing kiss, but he shoved me away. "We're done. Please, just go."  
"Frank..." I sighed, leaving the blissful glow from touching him behind as tears began to roll down my cheeks. I couldn't look at him. I couldn't have him see me cry. I didn't even take one last look. Instead, I moved quickly out of the RV to escape from Frank and the moment we had shared. Once out in the cold night, I ran to my car where I sat, trying to pull myself together before I drove to a nearby bar to have a few drinks. "Frank's gone..." I moaned into my drink as the bartender took the empty glasses away.  
"Dude, I don't care," he said, shaking his head as he walked away. 

**Frank's POV**  
Gerard's kiss before he left shook me to the core. I shoved him away, knowing that if I gave in now, I was a goner.  
"We're done. Please, just go." It was the first time that I'd ever seen him look like he was hurting. I couldn't think about it. As he left, I felt relief and pain mixed. Relief that he was gone, pain because I'd hurt Gee. As his taillights disappeared into the darkness, I realized that this wasn't over yet. Not by a long shot...


	3. Chapter 3

**Gerard's POV**  
I'm not sure how much I'd had to drink tonight, and I could barely see straight as I stumbled out to my car. I wasn't thinking straight after what had happened with Frank. I'd started drinking more and more after that night, and had become severely depressed.  
All I could think about was Frank. My feelings for him had consumed me. The ghost of his touch. The memory of how he felt laying next to me. The way it felt to be inside him. I could still smell him on my skin as if I were breathing him in. I could hear his voice ringing in my ears, scarring me with the last words he'd said to me all that time ago.  
It'd been a year. I hadn't been eating much, and my weight suffered from it. I never seem to be able to sleep anymore, only pass out from the drinking. I know Lynz was worried, as were my friends, but I needed him. I just couldn't do this without him. I didn't want to live without him.  
I practically fell into the car seat after struggling with the door. I pushed the key into the ignition, my eyes welling with tears as I left the bar's parking lot and started to head home. It's just few blocks away, but my mind was racing with thoughts of him. The tears falling faster, I sloppily wiped at my eyes, losing control of the car in the process. The old Plymouth jumped the curb, going down an embankment.  
I was sure this was it as the Fury rolled over and over, down the hill. 'I am going to die,' I thought, regretting my mistake of pushing him away. They say that your whole life flashes in front of your eyes when you're faced with death. It does, and Frank was mostly who I saw. Suddenly, I felt the terrible pain of my leg shattering just before I hit my head hard. After that, mercifully, I blacked out, Frank's name on my lips. 

**Frank's POV**  
It was two am, and I was almost asleep when my cell phone rang. I reached over to pick it up and look at it. Jamia mumbled sleepily, "Whats wrong?" I shook my head.  
"I don't know... what the hell?" Recognizing the number, I answered the phone, but the last voice I expected on the other end of the line was Lynz. She had never much liked me. I couldn't say as I blamed her. I felt a shock run through me in that moment, and I had never felt more awake than this moment.  
"Frank?"  
"What's wrong, Lynz?" I asked, a tinge of worry in my voice.  
"Its Gee... he... he's been in a bad car wreck," she said.  
"I'll get the first flight out. Text me the info about where he is," I told her. I suddenly felt like something inside me had died. I had not spoken to him since that night, and I suddenly regretted it, every last awful word I'd said.  
"I have to go, Jamia." She sat up sleepily, a concerned look in her eyes.  
"Frank, hon, what's happened?  
"Its Gee. He's been in an accident," I told her as I started racing around the room. She yawned, nodding her head.  
"Is he okay?" she asked as I rushed to find something to wear, pulling on some jeans and a shirt.  
"I don't know much of anything yet." I grabbed in my drawers for some other clothing, shoving it into my bag and running from the room.  
"Call me when you know something!" she called out behind me.  
"Will do!" I called back. I was moving so fast, I almost tripped and fell down the stairs. I burst out the front door, sprinting across the yard to the car.  
A guardian angel must have been riding with me. I drove so fast to the airport, I can't imagine how I didn't get pulled over, let alone wreck my car. I screeched into a parking space and quickly ran to the terminal. My luck held, and I found a red-eye flight leaving in fifteen minutes. I barely made it to the plane, panting as I sank to my seat, unable to relax.  
I couldn't sit still in my seat. As soon as the seat-belt light shut off, I got up and paced the aisle until a young flight attendant stopped me.  
"Sir, are you alright?"  
"Yeah... god, no. My... friend... was in a bad car accident..." She looked at me sympathetically.  
"Mr. Iero..." She blushed a little, acknowledging that she recognized me. "Is your friend going to be alright?"  
"I don't know, miss, but thank you for your concern... I'm sorry if my pacing is making anyone nervous."  
"Under the circumstances, it's not a problem. If anyone asks, I'll explain the situation, if it would help."  
"Thanks, miss. I do appreciate it." It felt like it took forever to get to LAX, but the moment the plane landed, I went to rent a car.  
9 and half hours after Gee wrecked his car, I was there at the hospital by his side.  
He was sleeping, his leg was in cast and his head was bandaged. Lynz was by his bed, looking like she hadn't slept in a week. "How is he?" I asked quietly as I came in. I wanted to give her a hug, but I somehow knew that she'd resent it.  
"He hit his head and was knocked out. He has a badly broken leg. They had to go in and do surgery to put pins in his leg to repair it... but, he'll live." She hugged herself, looking lost. "Right now we're just waiting for him to wake up," she said, not looking at me. I didn't know what to say. I stood there looking at his still form, relief washing over me that he was alive, though he looked much thinner and so damned pale. "He's never got over you, Frank. I...I thought he would, but he never did," she said softly.  
"I'm sorry," I told her, not sure what else to say.  
"He's been so depressed, he isn't eating or sleeping, and he went back to drinking heavily" She said sadly. "I don't think he's touched any drugs, but..."  
"He hurt me badly, Lynz, and he chose you." I told her.  
"No, he married me, but he loves you, Frank. I cant keep lying to myself, or trying to stand in the way. I'm done trying," She told me. "I'm just done. Good luck, Frank. You're going to need it." With that she stood, gave me a bitter smile, and walked out of the room.  
I watched her leave, unsure that there was any more I could say or do. I pulled the chair next to the bed, taking and holding Gerard's hand in mine.  
"You are such an idiot, Gee, doing this to yourself over me. I'm not worth this much grief," I said, not sure that he could hear me while he was out cold. I sat there by his side, waiting, gently rubbing his knuckles with my thumb.  
It went on that way for what seemed like hours before his voice filled my ear, low and scratchy. It was music to my ears.  
"Water, please..." Gee mumbled. I quickly got him some water and helped him sit up to drink. Once he downed the whole cup, I sat it down. "What are you doing here, Frank?" He asked softly, but didn't look me in the eyes.  
"Lynz called me." I informed him, gently squeezing his hand.  
"You didn't have to come, you know." he told me, turning his head away from me.  
"Gee, why would you do this over me?" I asked. "I'm just a man, not a hero or anything."  
"Frank, you are the love of my life." He looked up at me, sadness in his eyes, sadness I'd put there.  
"Gee, you ripped out my heart..." He sighed and nodded.  
"Frankie, you did the same to me."  
"Yeah, I guess I did, and I am sorry. I regret it, too."  
"I... I just need you, Frankie, and I can't live without you." Tears started to roll down his cheeks. "I can't keep going on this way!"  
"But we're married now. We have families." I told him softly, trying desperately to convince myself in a last ditch effort that I didn't want him. I failed miserably.  
"Just leave, Frank. I don't want you here," he told me, becoming agitated.  
"No, Gee, I won't leave you now, not like this," I told him. I heard him whimper softly.  
"Frank, I'll die without you... I can't keep going like this. Please don't do this to me," he said as he started to cry outright. I sat down next to him on the bed, put my arms around him and squeezed him tightly.  
"I never stopped loving you either, Gee," I told him honestly.  
"Be with me, then, Frankie. Please?" he plead.  
"Yeah, Gee, we can be together. We'll work it all out, somehow," I told him. With that, I leaned in, kissing him deeply.  
Soon he was sleeping, in what seemed to be the most peaceful sleep he'd had in a long time. I knew he and I would be together, but I just didn't know what we'd do about Jamia and Lynz. Right now, I didn't care, though. All I knew was that for the first time in my life, I was happier than I'd ever been. I would have Gerard in my arms where he belonged, and that I'd be in his, where he wanted me to be. I leaned in over the sleeping Gerard, kissing his cheek and whispered, "I love you."


	4. Epilogue

**Gerard's POV**  
It's been several years since the night of the accident. To be honest, it's been a long, rough road. Frankie has been here with me every step of the way, though, and I haven't been happier in my entire life.  
It took almost a year for me to be able to walk without at least a cane. Through all of the therapy, through a second surgery on my leg, Frankie has been by my side, encouraging me to keep going. He's been my rock, my reason to keep going. Any time I've shown signs of cracking, he's held me together.  
Jamia and Frank split, but they have remained friends. She'd always known about me and only wanted to see Frank happy. She and the kids are always hanging out with us.  
Lindsey and I, well, let's just say that while I can see Bandit any time I want, Lindsey can't seem to accept the fact that I am happy. Finally.  
Yesterday, we went out for a walk in the park. Just Frankie and I. There wasn't anyone there but us, and it was so peaceful. Frankie wasn't acting like himself, though, and I finally asked him what was wrong.  
"Nothing wrong, Gee-bear. In fact, everything is right." He stopped, and as I looked at him in confusion, my Frankie dropped to one knee, a ring box in his hand. "Gerard Arther Way, would you do me the honor..." I didn't even let him finish, I just smiled at him any nodded.  
"Yes, yes, a gazillion times yes!" He stood, then, holding me in his arms. Right where I always wanted to be. It was long road to get to this point, but we are happy now. We started out breaking each other's hearts and playing games, but I stole his heart, and he will forever have mine.


End file.
